Four B's For Relationship Bliss.


I decided to make this post today just to help some friends find a way out of unworthy relationships and hurts... Lately, i have been hearing break up issues and everyone is wondering "Why did he leave me?" "But i did her no wrong" "Probably i'm not good enough" "I will never love again"... Before i proceed, i want you to know that it's not every relationship that is meant to work out or end in marriage, so you don't have to feel bad when some relationships come to an end. Personally, i have had very terrible relationships in the past which i have taken most of the blames for; some of my past relationships should not have begun but it did anyway and i am here today with a better mindset plus a stable relationship just to tell you some basics i deduced from my past experiences and similar experiences shared by friends. But, to have a relationship bliss is not only centered on these four B's, but they are my B's for relationship bliss... I will put a part of me in this post today and i believe it would help someone.


1:  THE BRINGING FORCE{B1}

One major factor that help relationships work out well is what brought them together and why... As a matter of fact the bringing force is very vital. I was reading a book some time last year and the writer said something that got me thinking and i totally agree with that writer. He said "Relationships work simply because both parties know who they are and have taken time to build themselves to an extent before coming together". Of a truth, this is so true. If you know who you are before asking or accepting someone into your life, the journey becomes easy and break up is not an option. Unfortunately, what we see today is people dating without a proper understanding of why they need that relationship or the person and this is one major reason for break ups and negative feelings. Know who you are, start working on you and the path you love, i bet you things would align from there. Don't be too quick to date or accept someone into your life... Take your time, give communication your utmost concern,be friends, nurture dreams, talk about fears and support each other in the pursuit of what gives them joy. You don't date to find out if things will work out well or to see with time if the person is meant for you... This is a wrong notion. You cannot embark on a journey without knowing the destination and the requirements to get there... Basically, what brings people together is one major reason  why they stick together and make it work out and i will not forget to lay strong emphasis on building friendship first and taking out time to understand if you both can work things out before delving into trials and errors. To have a relationship bliss, concentrate first on the bringing force. Who are you? It is expedient that you know who you are hence you would be told what you are not. What both parties have become before or after they met, becomes the bringing force and a determining factor to RELATIONSHIP BLISS.

2: THE BUILDING FORCE{B2}



This is one area that a lot persons run away from. The building process is not usually a fun ride;it requires hardwork, patience, understanding and perseverance. It takes patience and love to watch a house grow from the foundation level to the finished work, so it is with relationships. When both parties realize who they are, nurture friendship and decide to build together,it might not be easy but they have to kill selfish desires, eradicate wants and work on needs instead. Let me give you a brief illustration; For a building to be what the architect planned it to be,every hand must be on deck towards the actualization of the building so it is with relationships. You have to be actively involved in the building process and there is no restriction as to who takes more responsibility{gender]. Be you the guy or the lady, the building process is a joint effort. I want to state here that you don't build with just anyone, the only person you are advised to build with is that special someone whom you see a future with. You may care to ask me what you use in the process of building... Well, you build with your time, ears, money and your drive. What drives you matters a lot in this regard. When i was talking about the bringing force, i laid emphasis on  knowing who you are before you cling to another; trust me this would help both parties in the building process. What you love to do, your purpose that you have found and the future you see together will help the building process easy and bring about RELATIONSHIP BLISS.

3:THE BINDING FORCE{B3}


As the name implies, it means to join together... I would still use the making of a house. The process is not usually easy but the builders work earnestly each day to get the best result. Using the cement as an example, the cement is that material that binds the blocks together coupled with water and other essentials. Every relationship success differ from the other as a result of individual differences as what binds this party might not bind the other party{I mean couple A and couple B]. All you need to do is understand your partner well enough to know what can bind you both. But there are things that bind effortlessly and they helped me as well;  Your true identity, your passion, prayers, communication, patience, perseverance and total commitment to the aim of coming together.What both parties decide to build and bind together, gives room for RELATIONSHIP BLISS.

4: THE BONDING FORCE{B4}


So, i have been using the illustration of building a house all through this post simply because anyone can relate with the analysis. Bonding is not easy to come by i must confess; all the listed above breeds bonding. If you have understood your partner well enough, built dreams and visions, persevered and communicated all through the process, there is no way bonding would be difficult. I must state here that it is not easy to go through any of the B's but once both parties can bond, relationship bliss is the result you get.



In summary, what brings both parties is one major reason why that relationship will work out positively. It is wrong to get into a relationship with the wrong reasons and expect it to end well. Do not be carried away with unnecessary things like just beauty or wealth, go for brains, passion and self discipline. Before you cling to the next available person, find out who you are and be true to yourself... Many relationships started with deceits and whatever thing that begins with deceits must definitely end in deceits. This is one major reason for hurts and misplaced priorities. Secondly is that the building process is vital; who you build with and what you have successfully built will be enjoyed by both of you so why not build anyways.Thirdly, work together to ensure that you stay together in love,trust, respect and understanding... This helps binding and lastly is the bonding time.  When couples have bonded as partners in a relationship, they have a win win mentality and the "us against them mentality" and this makes all things work out for good for them no matter the difficulties they encounter on their way to achieving RELATIONSHIP BLISS. To experience relationship bliss, is to have marriage as the long term goal of coming together in the first place.


All these and much more has helped me succeed in my relationship today and i hope it helps you too. Please feel free to drop your wonderful comments as to how we can experience relationship bliss. Your views, shares would be appreciated by me. I wish you no more hurts, dramas, pains, tears and regrets as you work towards experiencing relationship bliss with my four B's. Stay janded!

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12 Comments

Iboro Udoh said…
I absolutely love this article the 4B's. Bringing, Building, Binding and finally Bonding. People should actually take and sit and ask themselves deep questions concerning relationship. Beyond beauty and handsome what else can be brought to the table? Your partner should meet you fulfilling purpose so that he/she will start knowing what is causing the attraction. I have come to understand that purpose beautifies. Self discovery will always lead to spouse discovery. Sit back and develop your, do something and you will attract your kind. Purpose is the bedrock for a healthy relationship. It will naturally flow into the building process together which will require Patience and commitment. Binding and Bonding becomes an everyday affair because once there is an understanding of each other's vision it will naturally lead to binding and bonding.
God bless you Ebisidor for this post. It is worth reading.
I pray that our relationship will be built on a solid bedrock with great understanding
Iboro Udoh said…
I have shared this article on almost every group i have found myself on whatsapp. Read and share too. It is worth it
Ebijanded said…
Thank you Iboro for staying committed to my posts... I really do appreciate
Blessing said…
Thank u Ebijanded for always creating time to inspire....this is really an eye opener cause I've judged wrongly in most relationship and haven't been patient enough to go thru the stages...am glad am seeing this now and I decide to first be better bfr needing someone to do better... Ur blessed
Akaluka Emeka said…
Received this from a friend and thou at first I tend to find it hard to agree to part of the write up, I sincerely feel deep down it's just well articulated and I think am guilty of them... Thanks EBIJANDED, u sure did moved me...
Anonymous said…
It's worth the read,highly inspirational and thought stirring.
tee said…
4 B's.Nice write up,a lot of ppl still don't know this
Ebijanded said…
Thank you my Darling... Glad you got the point.
Ebijanded said…
Thank you Emeka. Now that you know you are guilty,just try working on it...smiles. All the best!
Ebijanded said…
Thanks much. Pass it on
Ebijanded said…
Thanks a lot dear...let's help them by sharing this post.
BAMS PMAN said…
hmmmmm...im moved. first thing i did was send this link to my partner to read too. thanks ebi